Avocado Seeks Human for Quiet Meals Together and Potential Relationship




Popular produce item.


I’m a green, fleshy, nutrient-dense fruit. (A lot of people think I’m a vegetable, but I’m totally okay with that.) My friends at Equal Exchange say that I belong to the genus Persea in the Lauraceae family. So technically I’m a berry! A big, green berry that’s great on chips and fish tacos.

I’m vaguely attractive in a squatty, green, rotund sort of way. I may seem tough on the outside but I’m tender on the inside. I love everything from a big party with a houseful of guests to quiet nights for two in front of a good movie. (People tend to overlook Ricardo Montalbán’s inspired, nuanced performance in “Conquest of the Planet of the Apes.”) Depending on what someone has in mind, I can be subdued or I can be wild and spicy. Versatility is my game.

Given my popularity, I’m not always available. So when I am, it’s special! Find your avocado crush at the Co-op now, on sale at 2/$3. Just in time for Co-op Month, fairly traded and looking for love.

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Ken Davis

Ken Davis is the Co-op's senior copywriter. Email him at kdavis@coopfoodstore.com.